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Prostitute to man

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1). Prostitute to man: “Hi, man, want to have sex? Man to prostitute “Ok. Only if you do it like my wife does.” Prostitute:”I can do it in any way. So how does she do it? Man:”She does it for free.”

2). A very sexy and attractive female employee to her boss: Sir, Will you remove something from my breast?
Boss:Wow! What’s that?
Your eyes, sir !

3). Sales Girl: Sorry sir, you can’t smoke here.
Customer: But I bought the cigarette from this shop.
Sales Girl: We sell condoms also but it doesn’t mean you can start fucking here.

4). A man forgot to zip up. So a lady tells him: You left your garage open. Man asks: Did you see my black Mercedes parked inside? No,she said, just a Mini Cooper with a flat tire.

5). Teacher: You’ve been e-mailing other pupils that I’m ugly!
Pupil: Sorry, miss, I didn’t realise you wanted to keep it a secret.

6). A couple had been married for 45 years and had raised a brood of 11 children and were blessed with 22 grandchildren. When asked the secret for staying together all that time, the wife replies, “Many years ago we made a promise to each other: the first one to pack up and leave has to take all the kids.”

7). Please, ma’am! How do you spell ichael? The teacher was rather bewildered. “Don’t you mean Michael?” she asked. “No, ma’am. I’ve written the ‘M’ already.”

8). In a bar, one guy says to another “I slept with your mom last night”
The whole bar was waiting for the other guy’s response. He laughs & says, “Lets go home dad, your drunk”

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